Thank Goodness It's Monday # 289: Running on empty?

FIVE CAUSES OF BURNOUT

AND WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT THEM

Still hanging tough … kinda just cruising along … on automatic pilot, until you’re absolutely convinced “things” have turned around once and for sure?

Many folks are. So they’re not pushing all that hard right now.

Or at least they think that’s what they’re doing.

But there’s one concern that’s often neglected in these days of operating in a “lean” personal and professional style: It may well be, without even realizing it, in the face of the hanging tough mindset, we are at greater risk of being overburdened with our worries and concerns.

And that kind of mental load can have a devastating impact on both family harmony and the business bottom line.

Kudos to you if you’ve hung in there this far. Don’t fall victim to “burnout” this close to the finish line.

TGIM ACTION IDEA: “When the going gets tough ….” Well, you know.

TGIM IDEA IN ACTION: Don’t brush aside your trepidation about the days ahead. Investigate and acknowledge sources of stress. Then discover (and share with others) how to alleviate these potential causes of mental fatigue and burnout.

Here are five common burnout flash points and what can be done to “get going” on them.

#1: Doing too much work. Why do we hold overachievers in such high esteem? Perhaps because they rarely voice complaints, managing the rigors of an extra-heavy workload with apparent ease.

But don’t kid yourself. Stuck in the status quo and doing too much of the same thing for too long can result in world weariness and feelings of hopelessness for even the most stalwart overachievers among us.

One tell-tale sign: When hairline cracks begin to show. Such as: The curt response to or from a usually civil spouse or coworker. The little foolish error on a task previously done perfectly multiple times.

Your move: Look for ways to lighten or add spice to the overachieving load. Reshuffle responsibilities. Use the newness factor to accomplish more with less chance of burnout.

To satisfy the overachiever mindset but achieve more, more successfully, take on the new, most stimulating tasks by handing off the jobs you’ve mastered. Assign them to others – subordinates, your kids, the new club member -- for whom they will be new and a learning experience.

Or – if you can’t share at least some part of your routine – counter the overachiever burnout factor by attempting old things in a new order, or at a new time or perhaps in a new way.

#2: Lack of challenge. Oddly, the converse of overachieving – not having enough challenging work – can also result in burnout.

Once work and life ceases to be challenging, it’s human nature to become uninterested and bored. And to further complicate matters, if you’re a boss keeping an eye peeled for employee burnout, the under-challenged employee is not likely to call attention to that situation.

Your move: Be vigilant. Create your own stimulus package. When life or business slows, seek out new motivators, for yourself and for others if you can help in that regard.

Make opportunities; don’t be content to coast. Ask for new responsibilities if you must. Believe in the stimulating strength of “new” – new challenges, new opportunities. The more strides you make along the path of lifelong learning, the more interested and interesting you become.

#3: Unclear goals. Sure, everyone wants to excel at their work and their life relationships. But people also need to know in no uncertain terms what’s expected of them. It’s at the core of good goal setting.

Coasting along with only vague and fuzzy objectives produces vague and fuzzy feelings that can be even more debilitating than driving relentlessly to achieve an overly high standard.

Your move: Even if they are currently not all that growth oriented, be sure goals and objectives are S.M.A.R.T. That mnemonic is usually understood to stand for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Time-Specific.

The point is: These qualities beat burnout by creating a motivating situation where – with the encouragement and support of others -- expectations and steps forward are quantified, improvement can be measured, and accomplishments along the way acknowledged.

#4: Lack of personal and professional fulfillment. Without continued growth, both personal and professional, people quickly stagnate. Today’s “paused” situation may produce that result.

Your move: Get out into the world and excite all your senses and inspire your sense of self with exposure to stimulating experiences. Be interested in others. Be interesting to others.

And be proactive in learning new skills or expanding those you already possess, whether it’s in a formal classroom setting or simply by self-education. The feedback loop of “education” affords burnout-busting benefits to all parties in the circle.

Bonus move:  Teach as well as be taught. Make sure you’re in a place in your company or community where you share what you know and can share in the experiences, reaction and feedback of the newly informed.

#5: Make room to grow. Sometimes being stuck in the status quo is enervating (especially when you’re “hanging tough” and reluctant to attempt any change until the fog has cleared somewhat). You feel it’s hard to move to the next level.

But “up” isn’t necessarily the only way to grow.

Your move: Extend your horizons. Use this opportunity to expand the parameters of your current situation.  Break out of confining definitions of who you are and what you do.

Grow in wisdom and influence. Beat the burnout blahs by discovering what others do well in areas where you are not now expert. Battle back against mental lassitude by endeavoring to reach that level of accomplishment yourself.

Payoff: Imagine being the corporate numbers person who has as effective a 30-second commercial as the best salesperson in the joint. Visualize the respect you’d gain as the PTA parent who also has the social media skills to blog, tweet and otherwise communicate most successfully about your community’s educational concerns.

Bonus move: Again, share your strengths and exchange skill-building strategies with others, and everyone derives some of the burnout-beating benefits.

Hoping these battling burnout ideas catch fire with you.

Geoff Steck
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing

8 Depot Square

Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-5373tgimguy@gmail.com   

P.S.  “Men weary as much of not doing the things they want to do as of doing the things they do not want to do.” Longshoreman and philosopher Eric Hoffer (1902 – 1983) also said that.

GEOFF STECK leads Alexander Publishing & Marketing, a company he formed in 1986. The core AP&M mission: To create and publish leadership, sales mastery, self-improvement and workplace skill-building resources and tools. The focus: Areas such as business communication, staff support, customer care and frontline management. Geoff also puts his corporate and entrepreneurial experience, independent perspective, and skills as a catalyst to work for other firms (ranging from multinational corporations to more modest operations), not-for-profits, and individuals who have conceived or developed programs or initiatives but are frustrated in getting them implemented.

Thank Goodness It's Monday #288 Eliminate the fear factor

HOW TO GET OTHERS

TO LEVEL WITH YOU

Monarchs of old often punished bearers of bad news, making it crystal clear just who was in charge.

As a result, these despots and dictators made decisions based on incomplete or distorted information, a fact that contributed to many military defeats and the crumbling of empires.

Welcome to the 21^st Century: Of course in our enlightened era, we know that the long-term outcome of a “shoot the messenger” strategy is not a more frank and forthright information exchange but, rather, withholding or revising of unpleasant truths.

So – in the “leadership” roles we’ve achieved as managers, or family heads or community leaders and such – we’re more benevolent than those kickin’-it-old-school kings and commissars, right?

Why then do we too often discover, after the fact, that we’ve taken action based on received information that’s distorted, inaccurate, and sketchy?

Why didn’t people level with us? The only way to get accurate information from people is to realize why they hesitate to give it, and act accordingly.

TGIM ACTION IDEA: It’s just like in those “days of old.” People fail to level with other people out of fear. Not like “off with her head” kind of fear but, nonetheless, fear ultimately connected to the psychology of survival.

If you’ve got any power, people are fearful.

Yes, of you pussycat. In all probability few TGIM readers have the fearful power to imprison or hurt people physically. We may even believe we’re perceived as gentle as a kitten.

But we all have power to wield. If you have “boss” status at work, at home or anywhere in the world at large, others recognize you might punish them in any of a thousand subtle and not-so-subtle ways.

Maybe you could fire them.

Or pass them over for promotion.

Or ground them or withhold their allowance.

People certainly don’t want to lose their livelihood or be on anyone’s blacklist.

They don’t even want mild disapproval. They fear – and “fear” is an accurate assessment of the dread feeling they experience – even a sharp remark; even from someone held in high esteem.

Need more proof? Think about what you feel when you find yourself in an inferior position.

TGIM Takeaway: People want to please. (Don’t you?) So, even when they would really like you, and maybe even mean to level with you, they frame their answers in terms of --

“What does he (or she) want to hear?”

The two-part antidote to this truth-distorting situation:

First: Realize that the fear factor isn’t likely to go away.

Then: Skirt it gingerly.

To judge whether you are being properly informed by others, ask yourself a few questions:

• Do people stop talking or change the subject when you approach?
• Do they give you information only when you ask for it?
• Are they reluctant to talk with you at all?
• Do people who must deal directly with you keep “lower-level” personnel away from you.

A “Yes” answer to any of these can be a sign that you’re getting something less than the whole truth.

Watch this: Sometimes individuals who recognize they aren’t getting the straight dope react by grasping for information in a way that makes matters worse. They may alienate their informants by cross-examining them. They may also create truth-twisting suspicion and conflict by inviting people to inform on one another.

TGIM IDEA IN ACTION: Eliminate the fear factor. Or mitigate it.

Here are a handful of Get-To-The-Truth Tactics that help do that:

Truth Tactic #1: Make a point of talking with people informally – not just when you want to learn something, but as a matter of habit. Chat, exchange small talk, remove the barriers that say, “I’m the boss; you’d better watch what you say.”

Truth Tactic #2: Be accessible to people at all levels. Executives who talk only to the next lower level of management tend to isolate themselves in a bubble of unreality. Accessible execs gain the perspective of a wider range of views.

Case in point: In my days in retail stores I knew a VP of Operations who, essentially every morning, walked through the basement receiving area and up through nine selling floors and support areas to his executive office, engaging with staff along the way. At lunchtime, if he was going out, he reversed the process; otherwise he routinely ate in the company cafeteria. And, at the end of most days, he walked down again through each floor a half hour before closing and was available at the bank of elevators until most everyone had gone home. Outcome: There was rarely an operational “surprise” in his years of service.

Truth Tactic #3: A useful way to skirt the fear of reprisal is to reward people no matter what they tell you, positive or negative. Don’t be one of those people who asks for comments or suggestions and then gets defensive. The people they engage soon learn to keep mum. Say, “Thanks for telling me that,” even if it’s the last thing in the world you want to hear.

In a similar line:

Truth Tactic #4: Be aware of how you sound when you ask for information. Through your wording, tone of voice, even gestures, you can unintentionally prejudice the answer.

And not just in a threatening, repressive way: If you ask with an expectant smile, “How do you like this idea?” you’ll probably come away thinking people love the idea when, perhaps, they are only trying to please.

A better way to gather information: Ask your question in terms of, “Which idea do you prefer, A or B?” striving to not indicate your preference.

Truth Tactic #5: When probing for information, realize that people are reluctant to be too negative. So you hear only the positive. They know from experience that even well-intentioned criticism can bring a backlash.

“It’s all good,” isn’t good. Be clear that you want to hear it all. When asking for comments, specify that you also want to be filled in on the minuses, especially if all you’re hearing are positives.

Case in point: A division president asked several people if they liked a recent reorganization. He got kudos all around. Then he asked if they noticed anything that “could be better.” He got many more candid and useful comments.

So level with me. Did this TGIM meet your expectations? Can you recommend ways you think it might have been made better? Have you insights to add?

Please feel free to share your thoughts.

I look forward to learning from you.

Geoff Steck
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing

8 Depot Square

Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-5373

tgimguy@gmail.com   

P.S.  “The best test of truth is the power of thought to get itself accepted in the competition of the market.” Supreme Court Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. (1841-1935) said that in his 1919 decision in Abrams v. United States – which also immortalized the phrase “clear and present danger.”

GEOFF STECK leads Alexander Publishing & Marketing, a company he formed in 1986. The core AP&M mission: To create and publish leadership, sales mastery, self-improvement and workplace skill-building resources and tools. The focus: Areas such as business communication, staff support, customer care and frontline management. Geoff also puts his corporate and entrepreneurial experience, independent perspective, and skills as a catalyst to work for other firms (ranging from multinational corporations to more modest operations), not-for-profits, and individuals who have conceived or developed programs or initiatives but are frustrated in getting them implemented.

Thank Goodness It's Monday #287 Another Legacy of MLK Jr.

Geoff Steck’s

THANK GOODNESS IT’S MONDAY  

TGIM #287

LIVE THE DREAM IN 2011

Martin Luther King Jr. said: "Life's most persistent and urgent question is: 'What are you doing for others?'"

Today marks the 25th anniversary of the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. federal holiday.

After a long struggle, legislation was signed in 1983 creating a federal holiday marking the birthday of Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. The federal holiday was first observed in 1986.

This Silver Anniversary milestone is a perfect opportunity to resolve anew to live the dream in 2011 as well as honor Dr. King’s legacy through service.

Here’s why: In 1994, Congress designated the Martin Luther King Jr. Federal Holiday as a national day of service and charged the Corporation for National and Community Service with leading this effort.

Taking place each year on the third Monday in January, the MLK observance is the only federal holiday also designated as a national day of service.

Because of Dr. King’s dedication to human rights and a better society, the holiday has become known as –

“A day on, not a day off.” And people are encouraged to perform acts that strengthen communities, empower individuals, bridge barriers, and create solutions.  

The MLK Day of Service is a part of United We Serve, a governmental national “call to service” initiative. It encourages Americans from all walks of life to work together to provide solutions to our most pressing national problems.

The MLK Day of Service empowers us individually and collectively to devise and implement solutions to social challenges and moves us closer to Dr. King's vision of a "Beloved Community."

Let’s face it: We still have work to do to realize Dr. King’s dream. Just as he set big goals and focused relentlessly on results, we need sustained citizen action to address today’s social challenges. 

Just one example: While Dr. King preached about justice, empowerment, love and peace, in the final months of his life, his attention was turned to fighting poverty.

Sadly, more Americans live in poverty today than during Dr. King's lifetime. Forty-seven million Americans currently fall below the poverty line.

TGIM Takeaway: The MLK Day of Service is a way to transform Dr. King’s life and teachings into action that helps overcome social trials and tribulations. That service may meet a tangible community need, or it may meet a need of the individual spirit.

TGIM ACTION IDEA: On this day, Americans of every age and background celebrate Dr. King through service projects. And the Corporation for National and Community Service makes it easy for you to get involved if you don’t already have a project in mind.

TGIM IDEA IN ACTION: To locate a volunteer opportunity in your community or plan your own project, just fill in your interest area and zip code in the “Find a Project” box that's off to the right above this blog's Archive List. 

Already feel you do your part? Then share your dream in the spirit of Dr. King’s legacy.

Everyone should live the dream in 2011. As Dr. King said, “We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.”

Geoff Steck
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing
8 Depot Square
Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-5373
tgimguy@gmail.com   

P.S.  MLK Jr.’s charismatic leadership inspired men and women, young and old, in this nation and around the world. His speeches, lectures and writings stirred the concern and sparked the conscience of a generation. Many of his great thoughts, compellingly expressed, live on today.

Among my favorites: “Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly. I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality.”

Got a favorite of your own? Share it today.

GEOFF STECK leads Alexander Publishing & Marketing, a company he formed in 1986. The core AP&M mission: To create and publish leadership, sales mastery, self-improvement and workplace skill-building resources and tools. The focus: Areas such as business communication, staff support, customer care and frontline management. Geoff also puts his corporate and entrepreneurial experience, independent perspective, and skills as a catalyst to work for other firms (ranging from multinational corporations to more modest operations), not-for-profits, and individuals who have conceived or developed programs or initiatives but are frustrated in getting them implemented.

THANK GOODNESS IT’S MONDAY #286 How do you define friends?

TGIM #286

YOU GOTTA HAVE FRIENDS, MY FRIENDS

Has the idea of friends changed dramatically in the great social media frenzy currently underway?

Of course it has. Here’s a quick roundup of some classic “friend” definitions:

• Person you know well and regard with affection and trust. "He’s been my best friend since grammar school."
• Ally: An associate who provides cooperation or assistance. "She's a good ally to have on your side when things get rough."
• Acquaintance:  A person with whom you are familiar. "At my age I have trouble remembering the names of all my acquaintances.”
• Supporter: A person who backs a politician or a team etc. "All the Giants’ supporters are very disappointed this year.”
• A member of the Religious Society of Friends founded by George Fox. (They never called themselves Quakers)

But do any/all your digital “friends” measure up to these parameters?

If you subscribe, as I do, to the business-wise concept that “It’s not so much who you know, but who knows you!” the imperative to “friend” folks in the available social media channels is of the essence.

Never before have we had such an accessible, minimal-cost conduit to share our thinking on virtually any topic with, well, just about the Whole Wide World. (Isn’t that what www.whatever stands for?).

And there are plenty of good reasons to do that; reasons that approach the kind of involvement we’d seek with the more limited circle of people we’d call friends in the pre-digitally-connected age.

That’s what these blog posts and TGIMs are about. I mean to share what I consider worthwhile thinking with friendly folks who find it worthwhile or who are willing to consider it and, if they disagree or have another view, are willing to air it out in a civil and objective way.

But we can’t all do that, can we? Can you be a friend to the whole world? Can 6,891,835,670+ human beings worldwide be “friends” with each other?

It’s doubtful. But –

That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t take the opportunity or make the effort.

Since Facebook alone connects 500 million of those nearly 7 billion folks out there (making it the equivalent of the third biggest country), as the lyrics, made popular by Bette Midler and Shrek declare, “You gotta have friends,” that’s for sure.

TGIM ACTION IDEA: Set standards for your “friending.”  Seek to include those who would be part of your circle and whose circle you wish to be part of. Don’t exclude out of hand those who don’t currently qualify as friends by the classic definitions.

TGIM IDEA IN ACTION: Apply some guidance that’s proven itself over the ages. An 11^th Century Persian prince named Kai Ka’us ibn Iskandar wrote a guidebook called A Mirror for Princes to instruct his young son in deportment.

Here, in a selection from a translation by scholar Reuben Levy, he advises his son in the art of making and keeping friends:

He who never spares a thought for friends never has them. Form the habit, therefore, of making friends with all manner of persons; many of man’s faults are hidden from his friends, although his virtues are revealed to them.

When you find new friends, never turn back on old ones and so you will always possess a host of them; and there is a saying that a good friend is a rich treasure.

Give a thought also to the people who are advancing with you but are only quasi-friends, to whom you should make yourself well-disposed and affable, agreeing with them in all matters good and bad and showing yourself to be favorably inclined towards them. In that manner, experiencing nothing but civility from you, they become wholeheartedly your friends.

When Alexander (the Great) was asked by virtue of what it was that he had been able to acquire so great an empire in so short a space of time, he replied, “By winning over enemies by kindliness and gathering friends about me by solicitude for them.”

TGIM Takeaway: Ralph Waldo Emerson summed it up nicely: “The only reward of virtue is virtue; the only way to have a friend is to be a friend.” And his friend Henry David Thoreau echoed the sentiment: “The most I can do for my friend is simply be his friend.”

If in 1837 or thereabouts there had been a high speed connection between Walden Pond and downtown Concord, I guess they would have “friended up” in a 21^st Century way as well. Imagine what that exchange would have been like.

You can friend me up anytime, my friend.

Geoff Steck
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing
8 Depot Square
Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-5373

tgimguy@gmail.com   

GEOFF STECK leads Alexander Publishing & Marketing, a company he formed in 1986. The core AP&M mission: To create and publish leadership, sales mastery, self-improvement and workplace skill-building resources and tools. The focus: Areas such as business communication, staff support, customer care and frontline management. Geoff also puts his corporate and entrepreneurial experience, independent perspective, and skills as a catalyst to work for other firms (ranging from multinational corporations to more modest operations), not-for-profits, and individuals who have conceived or developed programs or initiatives but are frustrated in getting them implemented.

Geoff Steck's TGIM #285: What Are You Making For 2011?

Thank Goodness It's Monday #285

WHAT ARE YOU MAKING FOR 2011?

RESOLUTIONS? GOALS? PLANS?

The beginning of any calendar year is inevitably a time for a renewed commitment to getting things done. Certainly in personal affairs. Often in business.

And how does this come to pass?

• Sometimes we “resolve.” Don’t you have a bundle of hot-off-the-celebrating New Year’s Resolutions all lined up; most likely things you resolved to get done in the past and now you’re really, really going to do in the days ahead? 
• 
  Sometimes we “set goals.” You quantify and commit to the idea that some specific outcomes will come to pass by some specific time.
• 
  Sometimes we “make plans.” We break the simply stated goals into manageable and measurable components and plot out a path to evaluate and adjust along the way achieving the goal.

And in the ideal world, we do all three. One quite worthwhile purpose of New Year’s resolutions and goals and plans and all such is –

To focus our attention. The mind won’t reach toward achievement until it has clear objectives. It’s then that the switch is turned on, the current begins to flow, and the “power to accomplish” drives the make-it-a-reality machinery. Then the magic can begin.

Fair enough, so far?  Good.

So let’s ask –

How’d all that work out for you in 2010?

Less than spectacularly?

Oh. Then –

What will you do differently for 2011? Besides resolutions, goals and plans, what are you “making” for 2011?

TGIM ACTION IDEA: Add one more item. Make a commitment to –

CHANGE

Here (I hope) is some insight into making change happen:

#1: Individuals change best when –

The motivation comes from within, rather than from the outside.

Example: You may think, “There’s not much I can do about my career until the economy shapes up.” Or you might say, “Things would be different for me at home if only my spouse were to behave differently.”

In these cases you’re relying on some external force to make change happen.

Why would you do that? You could be waiting forever.

Universal Truth: You are 100% responsible for you. Nothing will truly change until you do. And how does that happen?

TGIM CHANGE MAKER: Take responsibility. Rely on yourself. Set your own priorities. Motivate yourself by getting excited about the quest that lies ahead.

#2: Individuals change best when –

Their objectives are specific.

Maybe it’s stating the obvious. But let’s be clear. We do more when we have a purposeful direction.

Example: Objectives stated as glittering generalities -- such as “I want to get ahead” or “I want to lose weight” -- keep you from knowing whether you’re succeeding or failing because they set no measurable goal criterion.

TGIM CHANGE MAKER:  Putting performance measures, time limits, real milestones and actual rewards in the process makes it specific and easier to measure whether progress is being achieved or not. Once we have parameters in place, we more readily see change occurring. And knowing that change is effectively taking place can feed your personal satisfaction.

#3: Individuals change best when –

There’s public as well as personal commitment.

It’s more difficult to change in a vacuum. It helps to be held accountable by others and receive their support and feedback.

Example: You tell yourself “This year I’m really committed to losing 25 pounds by April 1.” But when the going gets tough after the first easier-off 10 pounds, you falter and sort of quit because, after all, who’s to know? And eventually all the pounds creep back, and then some.

TGIM CHANGE MAKER:  Tell others. Share your hopes, your dreams and your goals. Other people will be glad to give you feedback, support, ideas. And the more specific you are in detailing your aspirations, the more informative that feedback can be. But above all, by making the commitment “public,” you become more emotionally involved and that also helps you stick to it.

#4 Individuals change best when –

Changes are timely and gradual.

While the idea that revolutionary change comes dramatically in a flash of brilliance is appealing, life seldom happens like that. Change takes time. Individual change takes patience and time. Achieving the kind of significant goals we each outline at this time of the year won’t be done by tomorrow. (If they are, please share your extraordinary strategy.)

TGIM CHANGE MAKER: Be patient. Most changes require a series of events to occur in some evolving way. What we can do daily is to help some of those events occur. But even then, the magnitude and complexity of accomplishing great things demands shifts in attitude, values, policies and procedures – and that takes time and careful planning.

Putting it all together. You can have big, bold resolutions, well crafted goals and thorough plans but it’s the small choices that you’ll face after laying out and beginning this campaign that will have the greatest impact.

It’s the first business day of the New Year. I’m looking forward to another year of striving together to make 2011 our Best Year Ever. Let’s get tough and let’s get going.

Geoff Steck
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing
8 Depot Square
Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-5373
tgimguy@gmail.com   

P.S. “Figuring out who you are is the whole point of the human experience.” Pulitzer Prize winning journalist Anna Quindlan made that determination.

GEOFF STECK leads Alexander Publishing & Marketing, a company he formed in 1986. The core AP&M mission: To create and publish leadership, sales mastery, self-improvement and workplace skill-building resources and tools. The focus: Areas such as business communication, staff support, customer care and frontline management. Geoff also puts his corporate and entrepreneurial experience, independent perspective, and skills as a catalyst to work for other firms (ranging from multinational corporations to more modest operations), not-for-profits, and individuals who have conceived or developed programs or initiatives but are frustrated in getting them implemented.