HOW TO GET THE
RESPECT YOU EXPECT
Be known as the person who keeps promises.
That’s
one of the best ways to win the continued loyalty of customers as well as the
continued best efforts and respect of coworkers, friends, family and the
community at large.
“Duh!” you’re probably
thinking. “Kind of self-evident. If that’s the promised payoff of the Get The Respect You Expect headline, I
think you’ve broken a bit of the How To
promise there, Geoff.”
Got your point. More to the point,
pointing out the rewards of keeping promises also misses the point that promise
keeping is often –
Robert
Frost
(1874
– 1963)
About
those promises …
The poem portrays a speaker who stops his sleigh in the
midst of a snowy woods only to be called from the inviting
gloom by the recollection of practical duties.
Written
in 1922, Frost's most famous and most perfect lyric
(according to critic J. Mc Bride Dabbs) Stopping by Woods
on a Snowy Evening, conveys "the insistent whisper of death
at the heart of life."
Frost
called the poem “my bid for remembrance” and observed
that it is the kind he'd
like to print on one page
followed with "forty pages of footnotes."
|
Easier said than
done.
In 1923 Robert Frost (1874 – 1963) articulated that difficulty factor quite
poetically, closing his famous Stopping
by Woods on a Snowy Evening with the lines:
The woods are lovely,
dark and deep.
But I have promises
to keep,
And miles to go
before I sleep,
And miles to go
before I sleep.
If
you sometimes (or worse, often) feel you have “miles to go” to keep your
promises –
Perhaps you are making promises --
Too Big,
Too Quickly
Ouch! But just why are we
so quick to make overly generous promises?
TGIM INSIGHT: Probably because
it’s easy to do.
Promises
seem like a quick and painless-at-the-moment way to motivate people; a
no-cost-now way to get them to buy in now to what you think is in your best
interest now.
Eventually,
however, the time comes when the buy-in equation must be balanced. And if it
can’t be, or isn’t, that’s a broken promise. And that initial moment of
motivation goes right out the door, taking a big chunk of the respect that the
promise receiver once had with it.
So
–
No Promises = No Problem
Right?
Yeah, but … Making promises DOES
motivate when you’re not able to deliver the goods directly.
And,
maybe because we’re so used to being disappointed in the promise equation, when
you DO deliver on a promise made, it’s virtually assured to elevate you in the
estimation of the promise recipient who initially acted in faith on your
behalf.
So
here – as promised – is a respect-retaining --
TGIM ACTION IDEA: There’s nothing wrong
with making promises, provided you know – without a doubt – that you can
deliver your part of any bargain you make.
And
even with that “given,” be guided by a classic rule when you put the –
TGIM IDEA IN ACTION: Under-promise and
over-deliver.
It’s classic advice
for a reason.
This way you’ll find not only do promises work their no-cost-now magic but,
your stature will rise even higher when you deliver more than people
anticipated.
And
…
To
ensure you keep on the respect-building track and don’t shoot from the lip,
also observe these additional promising “What-To-Do” and “How-To-Do-It”
precautions:
►
Hold optimism in check. That way
they’ll be less likely to unintentionally over-promise or mislead people. A
good people-empowerer isn’t reluctant to talk to people about their future
prospects, of course. But be realistic when you do. Don’t create false hopes
and expectations by painting too rosy a picture.
►
Weigh your words. A pound is not 15½
ounces. “Almost” only counts in horseshoes. Forcing people to settle for
something less than they’ve been led to expect leaves a bad taste that never
quite goes away.
If
you want continued cooperation, always settle in full, however inconvenient or
painful you may find it.
►
Never forget. They won’t. Under
everyday pressure it’s easy to promise something then forget all about it and
assume they will too.
Well, they won’t. More than likely,
they’ll think about it constantly while they go about fulfilling their side of
the deal. And, actually, this is what you want them to do if the promise has
been made to motivate them. But, if you want to avoid repercussions, you’d
better not stop thinking about it either.
So
on that note –
Did
I deliver on the promise of the headline?
Respect! (“Got to have it.”)
Geoff
Steck
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing
8
Depot Square
Englewood,
NJ 07631
201-569-5373
tgimguy@gmail.com
201-569-5373
tgimguy@gmail.com
P. S. “It is
not the oath that makes us believe the man, but the man the oath.” Aeschylus (c.
525/524 BC – c. 456/455 BC) Greek soldier and playwright, often described as
“the father of tragedy” said that.
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