Thank Goodness It's Monday #369

HOW TO GET THE RESPECT YOU EXPECT

Be known as the person who keeps promises. 

That’s one of the best ways to win the continued loyalty of customers as well as the continued best efforts and respect of coworkers, friends, family and the community at large.

“Duh!” you’re probably thinking. “Kind of self-evident. If that’s the promised payoff of the Get The Respect You Expect headline, I think you’ve broken a bit of the How To promise there, Geoff.”

Got your point. More to the point, pointing out the rewards of keeping promises also misses the point that promise keeping is often –

Robert Frost

(1874 – 1963)

About those promises …

The poem portrays a speaker who stops his sleigh in the

midst of a snowy woods only to be called from the inviting
gloom by the recollection of practical duties.

Written in 1922, Frost's most famous and most perfect lyric

(according to critic J. Mc Bride Dabbs) Stopping by Woods

on a Snowy Evening, conveys "the insistent whisper of death

at the heart of life."

Frost called the poem “my bid for remembrance” and observed

that it is the kind he'd like to print on one page

followed with "forty pages of footnotes."

Easier said than done.

In 1923 Robert Frost (1874 – 1963) articulated that difficulty factor quite poetically, closing his famous Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening with the lines: 

The woods are lovely, dark and deep.

But I have promises to keep,

And miles to go before I sleep,

And miles to go before I sleep.

If you sometimes (or worse, often) feel you have “miles to go” to keep your promises –

Perhaps you are making promises --

Too Big,

Too Quickly

Ouch! But just why are we so quick to make overly generous promises?

TGIM INSIGHT: Probably because it’s easy to do.

Promises seem like a quick and painless-at-the-moment way to motivate people; a no-cost-now way to get them to buy in now to what you think is in your best interest now. 

Eventually, however, the time comes when the buy-in equation must be balanced. And if it can’t be, or isn’t, that’s a broken promise. And that initial moment of motivation goes right out the door, taking a big chunk of the respect that the promise receiver once had with it. 

So –

No Promises = No Problem

Right?

Yeah, but … Making promises DOES motivate when you’re not able to deliver the goods directly. 

And, maybe because we’re so used to being disappointed in the promise equation, when you DO deliver on a promise made, it’s virtually assured to elevate you in the estimation of the promise recipient who initially acted in faith on your behalf.

So here – as promised – is a respect-retaining --

TGIM ACTION IDEA: There’s nothing wrong with making promises, provided you know – without a doubt – that you can deliver your part of any bargain you make.

And even with that “given,” be guided by a classic rule when you put the –

TGIM IDEA IN ACTION: Under-promise and over-deliver.

It’s classic advice for a reason. This way you’ll find not only do promises work their no-cost-now magic but, your stature will rise even higher when you deliver more than people anticipated.

And …

To ensure you keep on the respect-building track and don’t shoot from the lip, also observe these additional promising “What-To-Do” and “How-To-Do-It” precautions:

► Hold optimism in check. That way they’ll be less likely to unintentionally over-promise or mislead people. A good people-empowerer isn’t reluctant to talk to people about their future prospects, of course. But be realistic when you do. Don’t create false hopes and expectations by painting too rosy a picture.

► Weigh your words. A pound is not 15½ ounces. “Almost” only counts in horseshoes. Forcing people to settle for something less than they’ve been led to expect leaves a bad taste that never quite goes away. 

If you want continued cooperation, always settle in full, however inconvenient or painful you may find it. 

► Never forget. They won’t. Under everyday pressure it’s easy to promise something then forget all about it and assume they will too. 

Well, they won’t. More than likely, they’ll think about it constantly while they go about fulfilling their side of the deal. And, actually, this is what you want them to do if the promise has been made to motivate them. But, if you want to avoid repercussions, you’d better not stop thinking about it either.

So on that note –

Did I deliver on the promise of the headline?

Respect! (“Got to have it.”)

Geoff Steck   
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing

8 Depot Square

Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-5373
tgimguy@gmail.com

P. S. “It is not the oath that makes us believe the man, but the man the oath.” Aeschylus (c. 525/524 BC – c. 456/455 BC) Greek soldier and playwright, often described as “the father of tragedy” said that.

P.P.S. Summer casual is a dress style, not an attitude. If fact, while others Laze Away their Summer Daze, you can build more skills that empower you on your way to amazing outcomes, here:

Thursday, August 23, 2012 …

Business Breakthrough III

Attend …
Build Skills …
Network with likeminded go-getters

Get on board NOW, HERE

(Sponsorship opportunities still available. Inquire Immediately.)

I'll be there (if you care).
I look forward to seeing you, too.

 

Thank Goodness It's Monday #368

WHAT WE CAN LEARN FROM

BIG, “OLYMPIC” DISAPPOINTMENTS

The games of the XXX Olympiad began disappointingly for me. 

·         Not that the opening ceremony wasn’t an amazing-but-sometimes-baffling theatrical/historical extravaganza.

·         Not that the filtered-by-commercialized TV, small screen experience could have been better.

·         Not that the entrance of the sky-diving-in-pink Queen far exceeded the distracting and superfluous Rowan Atkinson flatulence “humour” (note the Brit spelling).

·         And more such …

No, no, no and no.

What I wanted – and felt disappointed by because I did not get – was:

Roger Bannister

Roger Bannister
May 6, 1954
Miracle Mile 
3:59.4

If you have even an inkling of where I’m going with this, then perhaps you were disappointed as I was.

Where was Roger Bannister? He was present, but not specifically honored. Many (including British bookies who, pre-ceremony, had him as the 1:1 favorite) suspected he would be the individual given the honor of lighting the Olympic flame in the stadium. 

Why? On May 6, 1954, the Englishman, Roger Bannister, set a record many think is – 

The most remarkable

human achievement

in any sport.

He ran the first sub-4-minute mile in recorded history.  

His time: 3 minutes 59.4 seconds. 

Yes, I know: The story of Roger Bannister and the “breaking” of the 4-minute mile barrier is a bit “old.”

But it has an Olympic twist that is seldom discussed, but should be. 

Bannister was an Olympian in 1952. But he did not win the Gold as you might have expected from the first man to run a less-than-four-minute mile. 

Nor did he win Silver. 

He did not even win a Bronze medal. 

However –

(and, as you can see, it’s a big “however”)

He's pretty sure his Olympic-sized disappointment was the reason he pursued the supposedly impossible mark. 

Olympic “Ah Ha” moment: "I failed, came in fourth in the 1,500 meters," Bannister told author James M. Clash. "Very disappointed is an understatement. But if I had gotten a Gold medal, I probably would have retired and never pursued the four-minute mile."

TGIM “Ah Ha” moment: Disappointment should not curtail us in the everyday pursuit of our hard-to-achieve goals. We should see the opportunity in not fully realizing a goal and apply a bit of mental judo to building what-not-to-do-again and what-to do-differently skills to avoid a disappointing performance on the next big challenge. 

Like breaking the 4-minute barrier. “The mile” isn’t run in the Olympics or the world championships.  So the 2012 Summer Olympics won’t change the current record. 

But the details of the Bannister story are still worth knowing and drawing inspiration from. And, at this point in these track-and-field-focused Olympic days, they’re particularly appropriate.

It begins like this: Accurate times for running a mile (1609 meters) weren’t recorded until the late 1850s. The first accurately recorded “record” time for the mile was 4 minutes 23 seconds in 1858.

Nearly a century later an under-4-minute mile was thought to be beyond the physical limit of the human body. 

Here, in his own words, is Bannister’s recounting of the situation:

“The world record was four minutes, 1.4 seconds, held by Sweden's Gunder Haegg. It had been stuck there for nine years. It didn't seem logical to me, as a physiologist/doctor, that if you could run a mile in four minutes, one and a bit seconds, you couldn't break four minutes. 

“But it had become a psychological as well as a physical barrier. In fact Australian John Landy, having done four minutes, two seconds, three times, is reported to have commented, ‘It's like a wall.’”

But in the face of this, Bannister recounts, “I just couldn't see the psychological side.”

Clearly Roger Bannister’s post-Olympic feat is irrefutable evidence that failure isn’t fatal. Clearly he had an understanding of the Motivational, Inspirational Poster Point: 

Believe

that you can reach a goal

that was previously perceived

as unreachable.

And while that’s a useful mindset and basic starting point for overcoming disappointment and enjoying lofty achievements, it’s only a foundation.

TV Time Out: Now might be a good place in the story to take a bit more than 4 minutes and, if you are so inclined, see the race itself and hear Bannister commenting on his run, here: Bannister Miracle Mile.

Or you can skip it and keep reading. 

Just watch this: The fact that Bannister, after a disappointing Olympics, set an imagined-unachievable goal for himself and then accomplished it IS NOT NECESSARILY THE MOST IMPORTANT POINT here.

IMHO: For TGIM purposes the more impactful, good-for-you-and-me point is –

What happened next. Just six weeks after Bannister broke the 4-minute barrier, Landy, the Australian, set a new, faster mark with 3:58. 

But wait, there’s more: Within the following 12 months, dozens of athletes went on to break the 4-minute mile. 

Fast forward to 2012: The world record for the mile as of this posting is held by Hicham El Guerrouj of Morocco at 3:43.13. (Svetlana Masterkova of Russia holds the women's record of 4:12.56.)

TGIM ACTION IDEA: Barriers? What barriers? What was once felt to be impossible is commonplace today – the standard of all professional middle distance runners. 

TGIM IDEA IN ACTION: Even seemingly insurmountable barriers can be overcome with knowledge, understanding, dedication, practice, coaching, advancing technology and – 

Teamwork. “Wait,” you say. “One man’s triumphant crashing through a human speed record is about teamwork?”

You bet. If you watched the record-breaking race or read/hear virtually anything Bannister has to say about it, he specifically comments on the importance of his teammates and the pacesetters – Chris Brasher and Chris Chataway -- in creating his under-4-minute Miracle Mile performance.

TGIM Challenge: Who’s on your team? Whose team are you on? Are you helping each other or hindering your combined efforts. Are you all moving forward in a concerted, coordinated effort to avoid the disappointment of falling short of a goal? If not, why not? 

Learn from Olympic performances. Over 10,000 competitors with World-Class Goals and accomplishments must be doing something effective. And even the least successful athlete will acknowledge the absolutely critical support of teammates.

And speaking of World-Class Goals: How are doing with yours at this Olympic Summer Slump time of the 2012?

Disappointed? 

Then JDS. (For those who need reminding: Just Do … “Stuff”) It’s OK to be refreshing and rethinking, refiguring and rejiggering your goals. In fact it’s more than OK; it’s absolutely the right thing to do.

Just ask Roger Bannister. 

On the 50th anniversary of running his Miracle Mile, Bannister was interviewed by the BBC's sports correspondent Rob Bonnet. At the conclusion of the interview, Bannister was asked whether he looked back on the sub-4-minute mile as the most important achievement of his life. 

Surprising answer: Bannister replied to the effect that no, he rather saw his subsequent forty years of practicing as a neurologist and some of the new procedures he introduced as being more significant. His major contribution in academic medicine was in the field of autonomic failure, an area of neurology focusing on illnesses characterized by certain automatic responses of the nervous system. 

So Bannister worked at proving that neurologic failure doesn’t have to be fatal either. 

Maybe he’ll be lighting the torch at the next gathering of the Royal Medical Society. 

I’ll be cheering for that, too.

Geoff Steck   
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing

8 Depot Square

Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-5373
tgimguy@gmail.com

P. S. It’s not as if Bannister was totally without Olympic achievement and playing a key role in an opening ceremony. Prior to his 1952 attempted run for Olympic Gold, a 19-year old Bannister was helping the British organizing committee at the 1948 London Olympiad.

His running skills came in handy at the Opening Ceremony, when the Brits suddenly realized they didn’t have a flag to carry in.

His Olympic boss told young Bannister to hustle back to the car park and find his vehicle, which had a flag in the back seat. Bannister found the car but didn’t have a key. So he grabbed a brick and broke a car window to get the flag. 

“A policeman who was in charge saw, and an Army sergeant had to restrain him and say what we were doing,” Bannister reports. 

No disappointing performance then. In the face of mounting time pressure he ran back to the stadium and delivered the flag just as the British contingent was marching into the stadium. In newsreel footage of the event, you can notice the Union Jack is smaller than the flags carried by other countries.

Thank Goodness It's Monday #367

SPEAK WELL OF YOUR FIRM

-- AND ALL THOSE IN IT

Good policy for nearly a century.

No company can afford employees who complain about their firm or the people in it to anyone they don’t know well.

TGIM EXECUTIVE ACTION: Coach others to never criticize their company or coworkers in front of customers ... prospects … suspects …casual acquaintances … “the public” -- anyone they don’t know much about. It invariably leaves a bad taste. And it can ruin relationships that others have worked long and hard to build.

What prompts this “sudden” outburst on my part? 

What pushed my buttons recently was a little interaction that I will share with you in abbreviated form to get us closer to some universal what-to-do and how-to-do-it thoughts. Here’s my –

Case in point: While signing in in the lobby and waiting for my morning appointment to come bring me to his office suite, I remarked to the building’s receptionist that the name of the man I was calling on meant “nobleman” in German.

She gave an ironic laugh and said –

“He’s anything but!” The receptionist had little to gain by her remark; some momentary gratification at most. And (I hope) she had little idea of the harm she was doing. 

But that one flip remark tainted my thinking about the man and the whole organization. 

I confess that I could not give our meeting the 100% attention it deserved because that unconfirmed insinuation poked at my thinking like a sharp stone in my shoe. And, even with my heightened awareness, in my time with the executive I got no other impression that would have suggested her comment had merit. 

Fortunately (sort of) she was also at her station on my departure. So, while signing out, and out of the hearing of any others, I recapitulated our earlier exchange and suggested she should probably stop making such remarks or take her case up with HR.

She suggested I “Have a nice day.” 

I have not seen her since.

Why do people criticize their company or coworkers

– especially in the presence of strangers? 

Sometimes it’s because –

That’s the kind of people they are. They take pleasure in tearing others down. They look for things to complain about, and then start gossiping.

TGIM ALERT: Some people get into the habit of belittling personnel in their company to anyone who will listen. They should be stopped the moment such a tendency is detected. 

More often the reason people disparage each other is –

To get a monkey off their backs. Nobody likes to take the brunt of a customer’s disaffection. So people say or imply that others are responsible.

v  Suppose a customer calls about a late shipment. The salesperson doesn’t want to take the blame personally, so he or she passes the buck suggesting perhaps, “Our shipping department messed up the paperwork. They’re not too careful over there.”

v  When a bank customer complains about a mistake to a teller, the teller may blame the IT Department. “Those nerds aren’t bankers. They’re always making mistakes.”

v  When a department store customer asks about a change in return policy, the salesperson or floor manager may say something like, “I don’t like the new policy myself. Another whim of those guys in corporate, I guess.”

v  When a serviceman brings the wrong part for an appliance repair, he may cover himself by saying, “Those phone people always give me the wrong information.”

In my long career I particularly recall a VP in a small-ish firm who was constantly downgrading his employees to customers. Whenever anything went wrong, it was because the salespeople promised too much or manufacturing didn’t run a tight enough ship. This so-called executive constantly referred to the firm’s employees as “idiots” or “dummies.” 

Sure, there are plenty of books targeted at that Idiot/Dummy crowd. 

But just who was the idiot or dummy? It didn’t take people too long to discover that the employees were being blamed for the problems stemming from the poor skills of the VP himself.

TGIM ACTION IDEA: The way to stop this kind of criticism is to take the offending individual aside and talk to them. Odds are they don’t realize just how destructive such remarks are to the company and to themselves. Let them know.

TGIM IDEA IN ACTION: Also let them know how to handle problems without blaming others in the organization. 

 For example: 

v  Suggest they tell the customer they will “look into what’s holding things up” instead of blaming a delay on “those guys in shipping.” 

v  Or they might say, “I’ll correct the mistake and get back to those responsible so it doesn’t happen again.”

v  Or they might say, if the source of a problem is specifically identifiable, “Milt in shipping would want me to correct it ASAP. I’ll straighten it out now.”

v  Or even just not calling Milt an idiot might be acceptable.

Speak well of your firm and others in it. And let the insiders know that the idea is to support their colleagues and present a united front to the customer. Above all, see to it that people in supervisory positions stand by their people when talking to customers. It gives a better image of the company.

In every company, of course, people do make mistakes and need correction. Every company has its dirty linen. And I should be washed.

Just not in public.

Geoff Steck   
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing

8 Depot Square

Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-5373
tgimguy@gmail.com

P. S. “SPEAK WELL OF YOUR FIRM” 

That was the ALL-CAPS injunction of a 42” x 28” “motivational” poster (pictured above) that was given to me when I assumed my first publishing job that had managerial, people-handling responsibilities. 

It was a real time capsule, even when I first received it 40+ years ago. The illustration (five fashionably suited men in discussion in a rather abstract “office” space), the colors, the graphic design, the type and typographic layout, the punctuation and capitalization -- all hint at an origination date perhaps as early as 1920.

But even now, at what may well be a century later, the message is evergreen. It is: 

When you “knock” your

Firm, you insult yourself,

because you are Part

of the Firm. When you

Praise and Speak-Well of

your Firm, you speak

well of yourself: as a

part of your Firm you

therefore profit.” 

Boosting Pays! 

Throughout my most “corporate” days it hung on the wall behind me in my office. Maybe I should not have taken it down.

Thank Goodness It's Monday #366

14,000 ATHLETES

ALL AIMING

AT THE SAME ELUSIVE GOAL

Front and Reverse of the
2012 Summer Olympics
 (officially the Games of the XXX Olympiad,
also known informally as London 2012)
Gold Medal

The 2012 Summer Olympics are about to get under way in London. At the center of it all, perhaps as many as 14,000 world-class athletes – some you have heard of, many you have not – each one aiming at the same elusive goal:  

Victory. And at every turn there will be “the thrill of victory; the agony of defeat.”

Just like any other day in your life and mine.

Really. 

It is quite like that, isn’t it?

Every day has Olympic moments. Just look at our non-athletic, work-a-day world. In very practical business terms for example:

Someone makes the sale.

Everyone else is a runner up.

No silver or bronze medals are awarded.

You can’t win them all. In fact, truth is, like most of the 14,000 athletes striving in the 302 Olympic gold medal events, even at the highest level, you can win very few outright.

BUT --

(And, as you can see it’s a big “but …”)

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. And try your damnedest.

We’ll dig deeper into precisely how to do that momentarily. But first, to establish my “cred” and impress you with my innate ability to lead you to mastery –

Now …

   Before the opening ceremonies are even underway …

       In the most amazing feat of sports prognostication that you will ever witness …

          I will reveal the Olympic athletes who WILL NOT WIN Olympic gold:

And the LOSERS are:

Every athlete who is focused on winning.

Yup. 

The WINNERS will be:

The athletes who want to win

and focus on giving a full effort.

Full disclosure: I learned this lesson from my friend the noted sports psychologist, Rob Gilbert, Ph.D. 

Dr. Rob often makes this point -- almost every athlete focuses on the wrong thing: winning – by getting the folks he would inspire to, well –

Focus on the wrong thing. He does it with a child’s --

RIDDLE: Anna’s mother has three daughters. One is named “Penny.” Another is named “Nickel.” What is the name of the third daughter?

·         Are you thinking the answer is “Dime” or “Quarter” or “Half-Dollar”? 

·         Are you such a Jersey-minded Abbot and Costello fan that you think the name is “What.” (Who’s On First, What’s On Second, etc. Lou was devoted to his home town of Paterson NJ where a Who’s-On-First related statue has been erected in his honor.)

Back to the point: Those answers are not even close because you’re focusing on the wrong part of the riddle. 

If you focus on the first two words – “Anna’s mother” – you’ll realize that the third daughter’s name is -- drum roll, please -- Anna! 

Olympic “Aha!” moment: Most athletes do something similar. They’re focusing on the wrong thing. They’re focused on winning.

This is a big mistake.

Why?

TGIM “Aha!” moment: Because they – and we, in our daily challenges, Olympian or lesser – do not have control over winning.

But we do have control over our effort. 

TGIM ACTION IDEA: Keep your focus on your effort, not on the outcome. Keep your focus on the process, not the product. Keep your eye on the ball, not on the trophy stand. Know that every time you compete, it’s important, but – in the scheme of life – not that important.

TGIM IDEA IN ACTION: Prepare and tackle every major challenge you foresee with an Olympian mindset. Drill. Get coached. Continually hone your skills. Play up to your potential and play full out. Be in the moment; remain intent on the task at hand. And -- most of all -- focus on effort, not outcome.

In his book, Awareness: The Perils and Opportunities of Reality, Anthony De Mello quotes a Chinese sage who expounds: 

“When the archer shoots for no particular prize, he has all his skills; when he shoots to win a brass buckle, he is already nervous; when he shoots for a gold prize, he goes blind …. His skill has not changed, but the prize divides him. He cares! He thinks more of winning than of shooting, and the need to win drains him of power.”

TGIM Takeaway: Care – but not that much. Focus on your effort, not outcome. 

See you on the medal stand.

Geoff Steck   
Chief Catalyst
Alexander Publishing & Marketing

8 Depot Square

Englewood, NJ 07631
201-569-5373
tgimguy@gmail.com

P. S. “People want to be amazed. So that’s what I’m working for.” Usain “Lightning” Bolt, Jamaican sprinter and a five-time World and three-time Olympic gold medalist, said that. He is the world record and Olympic record holder in the 100 meters, the 200 meters and (along with his teammates) the 4×100 meters relay. Think he’s focused on his effort? "To Di World!"